Ever find yourself wishing you had children? How about wishing that Colin Meloy would tuck those imaginary children in and read them a bedtime story? Well, sometimes dreams do come true. Word just leaked that Meloy and his wife/artist Carson Ellis have teamed-up to write a children’s book together, with Meloy handling the words and Ellis tackling the illustrations. Though you might not recognize Ellis’ name, you probably recognize her work: he’s been responsible for the art of every Decemberists and solo Meloy album. Ellis recently dropped some hints regarding the book on her blog, but the details were slim. What we do know is that it will be titled The Unfortunate Demise of Whitley Rackham and it’s due for a limited-edition, letterpress-printed release.

No word yet though on when the perfect gift for hipster parents will be published. In the meantime, I suggest they put on their copy of Lullaby Renditions of Radiohead.

The Decemberists new “A Short Fazed Hovel” tour is almost too high-brow for my brain to take so early in the week. As you might expect from Camp Meloy, this is no ordinary tour—on this here jaunt across the States and through the UK, the Decemberists are playing their most recent album, The Hazards of Love, in its entirety.

If they’re not coming to your train stop, NPR Music is going to broadcast the Decemberists’ performance (a special set, not The Hazards of Love) at Newport Folk Festival on August 1. The band also appeared on NPR’s World Cafe with an interview and performance, so get all caught up here.

Tour dates are as follows:

08.01.09 Newport, RI @ Newport Folk Festival
08.02.09 Montreal, QUE @ Osheaga Music & Arts Festival
08.03.09 Toronto, ONT @ Kool Haus*
08.05.09 Madison, WI @ Orpheum Theater*
08.06.09 Chicago, IL @ Metro*
08.07.09 Chicago, IL @ Lollapalooza
08.08.09 Indianapolis, IN @ Murat Egyptian Room*
08.10.09 Louisville, KY @ W.L. Lyons Brown Theater+
08.11.09 Detroit, MI @ Royal Oak Theater*
08.13.09 Buffalo, NY @ UB Center for the Arts*
08.14.09 Pittsburgh, PA @ Byham Theater*
08.15.09 Schwenksville, PA @ Philadelphia Folk Festival
08.16.09 Holyoke, MA @ Mountain Park*
09.20.09 Burlington, VT @ Flynn Theater**
09.21.09 Montclair, NJ @ Wellmont Theater**
09.23.09 Norfolk, VA @ The Norva**
09.24.09 Charlottesville, VA @ Charlottesville Pavilion**
09.25.09 Asheville, NC @ Thomas Wolfe Auditorium**
09.27.09 Nashville, TN @ Ryman Auditorium**
09.29.09 St. Augustine,FL @ St. Augustine Amphitheater
09.30.09 Orlando, FL @ Hard Rock Live**
10.02.09 Houston, TX @ House of Blues**
10.03.09 Austin, TX @ Austin City Limits Music Festival
10.04.09 Tulsa, OK @ Cain’s Ballroom**
10.06.09 Lexington, KY @ University of Kentucky, Lexington**
10.07.09 Columbia, MO @ Ninth St. Fall Fest**
10.18.09 San Francisco, CA @ Treasure Island Music Festival
11.18.09 London, UK @ Forum 11.19.09 London, UK @ Coronet
*with Heartless Bastards
+with Blind Pilot
**Laura Veirs & the Hall of Flames

Dedicated to those songs that I can’t stop playing, humming, or thinking about; the 4+ minutes you fall head-over-heels in love with. Past instances have included ‘Til Tuesday’s “Voices Carry,” The Groovie Ghoulies’ “I’m Doin’ Fine,” and The Jimi Hendrix Experience’s “Bold As Love.”

It’s getting warm here in Southern California. A stint of chilly Spring is giving way to Perpetual Summer, and everyone’s very excited. I’m often reminded of that Baz Luhrmann “song” “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)”, where they advise the class of 1999 to live on the East Coast, but move before it makes you hard, and to live on the West Coast, but move before it makes you soft. Too late. I’m soft as a pillow made of kitty dreams and Muppet babies. A few weeks of temperatures in the 60s and I am ready to freak out. Why are we even bothering to kill the ozone layer if we can’t manage some decent weather around Hollywood?

As our weather perfects itself, cool breezes have become more common on my neighborhood walks, and those breezes deserve a soundtrack. And for whatever reason — but mostly desperation for a song on which to fixate — that soundtrack has come via Rufus Wainwright’s track 1, side 1 of his album #1, “Foolish Love”. I have no precedent in my catalog for this CD. I remember buying it after I saw a “CBS Sunday Morning” story on Wainwright and dug his style. But I’m not a retro-sound guy, really. Make no mistake: I love nostalgia, and dinosaur rock, and all that sort of thing. But I have no patience for (most) music made of this era, but sounds like a past era. The whole Big Band craze fits in this category. Yeah, Brian Setzer had an energized Orchestra; but I can’t music giving me a history lesson. Even though it may cost me my membership card to the indie world and dark-rimmed glasses club, I have similar problems enjoying the Decemberists, and you may send me as many nasty comments about the feces in my ears as you like. Some music feels natural and others feel completely cerebral; it just so happens that I respond best to the natural type, and I get that vibe from Wainwright’s music. Listening to “Foolish Love” — an immaculate recording of brittle production and sassy performing — nothing could feel more matter-of-fact.

For all his Tin-Pan Alley longings (am I even using this reference right?), something about Wainwright’s style sits well with me. It soothes, calms and engages me. His vocal style come so close to being horrible that it’s great, and there’s nothing more rock ‘n’ roll than that. Isn’t the search for that blurry line separating greatness and terrible disaster the essence of every artistic endeavor? If music expresses what words fail to articulate, and if that same blurry line does exist somewhere but we just can’t quantify it, then it is only discovered by the actual creation of art. Whatever the case, Wainwright’s singing rests just this side of awful and annoying, and the effect is invitation. Harry Caray used to say that the charm of having a bozo like him sing “Take Me Out To The Ball Game” was it got everyone in the stadium to think, “Well, if he can do it…” and then join in. Same thing here. We’ve all got a moaning whine living in our nose. Have had it since age three. “Foolish Love” provides an adult theme for that childish whine, and even though the topic might not be so appealing (mourning a failed love affair), the style of the song is immensely invitational.

Almost all of the lyrics are memorable and perfectly hung on or around the song. Almost. It’s just me; I never seem to get lyrics right. If I really work at it, sometimes I manage to scrape out a bit of accuracy, but I’m usually too lazy to care. If I don’t like a song, no amount of lyrics are going to help. What’s even more embarrassing is when I love a song, sing along with it for years, and still don’t get the lyrics right. I have made up my own, and often times when I learn they’re wrong, my Lyrics still resonate better with me. This says a lot about my ego. The fact that I misheard “Why can’t you last?” in “Foolish Love” as “Why can’t you laugh?” says even more about my personality. I always got that this was a mellow and melancholy song, so I must have equated a lack of laughter with the kind of misery being portrayed. I’ve been humming that bit incorrectly for ten years, and it’s only this week — after subjecting myself to a strict listening regimen — that I finally heard the “-st” at the end instead of a “–ff.”

I’ve mentioned before that a sad song can make me feel great, and that’s the case again with “Foolish Love.” I think this has more to do with my relationship and reactions to beauty in any form rather than the content of that beauty. “Foolish” is a song about denial and putting on false smiles and pretending not to care when really you cannot let go of the thing you should let go… and it makes me feel great. This great feeling, my friends, comes from songwriting. Simple, clear, precise songwriting. A perfect example can be found in the two notes — TWO NOTES — played before the “peppier” middle section (the “denial movement”). True, they’re mostly there for a transition between keys in the song, but they act a greater purpose in being a low note followed by a high note. I’m sure there’s endless papers and essays from top scientists I could find and quote, and make tons of links to their experiments and historical data that prove that a low note followed by a high note translates in our basic human souls as “up beat,” but I’m not going to. And not just because of my firm embrace of Fox News style journalism, and not just because I’m lazy (mostly though); it’s because it’s clear as day if you just listen to it. There it is.

By the way, just a live version today. A great one, but the studio cut is gorgeous.

Here’s your second really good reason to head down to Austin this year: Pearl Jam, Dave Matthews Band and the Beastie Boys have been announced as headliners for this year’s Austin City Limits Music Festival, October 2-4 in Zilker Park.

The three-day, eight-stage festival will also feature Kings of Leon, Thievery Corporation, the Dead Weather, Ghostland Observatory, Sonic Youth, Bon Iver, Passion Pit, Arctic Monkeys, the Decemberists, Girl Talk, Phoenix, School of Seven Bells and Dan Auerbach among the 130 bands and artists booked.

You can get three-day festival passes for $185 (no service fees), plus check out VIP package options, here. Headlining band Pearl Jam will also be appearing on the Austin City Limits TV show while they’re in Texas — the public television series was the inspiration for the festival eight years ago.

Austin City Limits Music Festival Line-Up
Pearl Jam
Dave Matthews Band
Beastie Boys
Kings of Leon
Ben Harper and Relentless7
Thievery Corporation
John Legend
The Dead Weather
The Levon Helm Band
Ghostland Observatory
Sonic Youth
Mos Def
Toadies
Flogging Molly
The B-52s
Lily Allen
Citizen Cope
Arctic Monkeys
The Decemberists
Coheed and Cambria
Andrew Bird
Girl Talk
STS9 (Sound Tribe Sector 9)
Phoenix
Bassnectar
Bon Iver
!!!
The Avett Brothers
The Airborne Toxic Event
Medeski, Martin & Wood
Clutch
Michael Franti & Spearhead
Grizzly Bear
Heartless Bastards
Passion Pit
White Lies
Dan Auerbach
The Walkmen
The Scabs
Reckless Kelly
Devotchka
Blitzen Trapper
The Virgins
Here We Go Magic
Eek-A-Mouse
K’ Naan
Asleep at the Wheel
Dr. Dog
The Raveonettes
The Knux
Black Joe Lewis & the Honeybears
State Radio
Los Amigos Invisibles
The Felice Brothers
Federico Aubele
Raul Malo
Daniel Johnston
Poi Dog Pondering
Brett Dennen
Rodriguez
Henry Butler
Preservation Hall
Sam Roberts Band
The Greencards
Sara Watkins
Walter “Wolfman” Washington
David Garza
John Vanderslice
Zac Brown Band
Todd Snider
School of Seven Bells
The Dodos
Robyn Hitchcock and the Venus 3
Alberta Cross
Deer Tick
Bell X1
Alela Diane
The Wood Brothers
The Parlor Mob
Rebirth Brass Band
Marva Wright
Terri Hendrix
L.A.X.
Lisa Hannigan
The Low Anthem
Sons of Bill
Suckers
Sarah Jaffe
Cotton Jones
The Henry Clay People
Papa Mali
Jypsi
Vince Mira
Jonathan Tyler & the Northern Lights
Mimicking Birds
Jeffrey Steele
Jonell Mosser
Leatherbag
Keith Gattis
Damien Horne
Sarah Siskind
Dexateens
Nelo
Danny Brooks
Reverend Peyton’s Big Damn Band
The Soul Stirrers
The Durdens
Palm School Elementary
The Gospel Silvertones
Diaconos
Quinn Sullivan
Ralph’s World
Q Brothers
Milkshake
Telephone Company
Loose Cannons
Lunch Money

SXSW is just a few short weeks away, and the performance schedule has finally been officially released via the event’s website. Yes, it is only the “official” line-up, and there are sure to be tons of “unofficial” parties announced in the next few weeks, but it’s nice to get a few confirmations to add to our schedule.

While the Film festival starts earlier in the week, the musical acts will start on Wednesday, March 18 and run through Sunday the 22. With artists like Phosphorescent, The Bronx, A-Trak, and The Decemberists, Black Lips, Grizzly Bear and blog-boy Wavves confirmed to perform along an ever-increasing line-up of huge acts like Devo or the oft-rumored Metallica, it’s sure to be the gaudy, drunken experience we’ve all come to expect.

Batten down the hatches Austin, the world is coming to tear shit up. You can see the full line-up here.