Ah, the perks of being moderately famous: if you spit on a bouncer, you only have to spend one night in jail, pay $521 in fines (including $200 to the offended doorman), and receive a chastisement from your presiding judge as to the “serious health implications” of spitting in public. For many people, including, apparently, Lady Sovereign, wander around unaware of the drastic consequences of hawking a loogie on someone else. Sov was detained over the weekend in Australia after drunkenly spitting on a nightclub doorman; she was released in time to make her afternoon slot at the country’s Parklife Fest.

Following in the footsteps of many celebrities before her, Sov took to her Twitter account to comment on the sequence of unfortunate (and spitty) events: “”Brisbane police need to go catch some real criminals … What a waste. Spitting in someone’s face is nasty, but how about a guy dressed up as a girl running at you in the toilets and punching you in the head? Yes, that’s what happened prior to the spitting. So everyone please stop calling me nasty. If you was there you would understand. The transvestite must have been a regular because I didn’t see no one dragging his ass out of the club that night.”

Random mention of a transvestite customer aside (how does that bolster her argument of being unfairly treated?), Sov continued to focus on the bright side of things, writing that despite her brush with the law, she was “enjoying Australia.”

Tripwire correspondent Meiyee Apple takes us through her guide of SxSW day parties with her search for free music and drinks on Saturday, March 21. Check out her Thursday and Friday installments too — her liver appreciates it.

After the serious day bender from Friday, I felt I had to lay a little low for Saturday. I felt that way, but I didn’t actually do that.

For the sake of this video diary, I needed to hit as many parties as I could, plus it was the last day; my final effort. Of course nothing ever goes as planned.

The Rachael Ray Party had a line half way around the block. As much as I love fancy food and Ra Ra Riot, I don’t like snaking lines just for a tiny nibble and to hear the excessive use of the term “Yum-Oh.” No thanks. [Editor's note: Meiyee's video shows nothing she describes above or below, but we won't fault her for it since she was drinking the whole time.]

After hitting the Carrera Café for food and booze, I stumbled to the Rusty Spur for some Americana from an LA singer/songwriter by the name of Austin Hartley-Leonard. I’ve come to notice that the parties that I attend look sparse, but it really varies depending on my position in relation to the bar.

The Levi’s®/FADER Fort had a special treat for all of us. Kanye West performed with special guests Common and Erykah Badu. Watching indie kids dance around pretending they like hip-hop is almost as entertaining as what’s on stage.

Afterward, I roll over to the Perez Hilton party — as relevant as he is in our music world — where we were treated with Solange (you may know her sister better), Little Boots, and Perez Hilton bitching about Lady Sovereign being too sick to show up. He continued to berate her, and might as well have put up a picture of her on the stage and paint fake cocaine from her nose and jizz from her mouth. Kanye showed up there as well.

The next late-night jaunt was to the Vice party held at a closed down booty club. It was the usual hellish line only to find out that when you finally were let in barely anyone was inside. Oh, but there was tequila and hardcore bands.

Capping off the night with a trek to Taco Cabana, I’d have to say it was a good SxSW.

Thanks Austin for showing our drunk asses a good time. See you next year.

Some of our favorite Englishmen and one very petite and feisty English lady are heading to this side of the ocean this summer, and we’ve got all the dates and deets for you here now.

Lady Sovereign will be embarking on her first U.S. tour along with Chicago-based DJ Annalyze. She’s supporting her new album, Jigsaw, and hopefully she’s ready to live up to the reputation she’s built for herself opening for Gwen Stefani, playing to a cool million in Times Square on New Year’s Eve and playing foosball with our editor.

Lady Sovereign tour dates
05.01.09 – Toronto, ON (Lee’s Palace)
05.02.09 – Montreal, QC (Club Soda)
05.03.09 – Boston, MA (Paradise Rock Club)
05.04.09 – NY, NY (Highline Ballroom)
05.06.09 – Brooklyn, NY (Music Hall of Williamsburg)
05.07.09 – Philadelphia, PA (Church – Sanctuary)
05.09.09 – Washington DC (9:30 Club)
05.11.09 – Baltimore, MD (Sonar Club Stage)
05.12.09 – Cleveland Heights, OH (Grog Shop)
05.14.09 – Chicago, IL (Metro)
05.15.09 – Milwaukee, WI (The Rave Bar)
05.16.09 – Minneapolis, MN (Fine Line Music Cafe)
05.18.09 – Denver, CO (Bluebird Theater)
05.19.09 – Salt Lake City, UT (Club Sound)
05.21.09 – Seattle, WA (Crocodile Cafe)
05.22.09 – Vancouver, BC (Richard’s On Richards Cabaret)
05.23.09 – Portland, OR (Doug Fir Lounge)
05.24.09 – San Fran, CA (Popscene @ Rickshaw Stop)
05.26.09 – Los Angeles, CA (El Rey Theatre)
05.28.09 – San Diego, CA (House of Blues)

Depeche Mode will also be heading out, on the road, in the sky, pretty much just about everywhere on the planet. And if not everywhere, then at least 27 countries in four months. It’s pretty insane, but it works quite nicely with the title of their upcoming LP Sounds of the Universe. The first single from the album, “Wrong”, comes out April 21 on Capitol/Mute in the U.S. and April 20 in Europe.

Depeche Mode’s Tour of the Universe
05.06.09 – Luxembourg, Luxembourg (Rockhal)
05.10.09 – Tel Aviv, Israel (Ramat Gan Stadium)
05.12.09 – Athens, Greece (Terra Vibe Park)
05.14.09 – Istanbul, Turkey (Santral)
05.16.09 – Bucharest, Romania (Parc Izvor)
05.18.09 – Sofia, Bulgaria (Vasil Levski Stadium – Tuborg Greenfest)
05.20.09 – Belgrade, Serbia (Usce Park – Tuborg Greenfest)
05.21.09 – Zagreb, Croatia (Arena (Tuborg Greenfest)
05.23.09 – Warsaw, Poland (Gwardia Stadium)
05.25.09 – Riga, Latvia (Skonto Stadium)
05.27.09 – Vilnius, Lithuania (Zalgirio Stadium)
05.30.09 – London, England (02 Arena)
05.31.09 – Landgraaf, Netherlands (Pinkpop Festival)
06.02.09 – Hamburg, Germany (HSH Nordbank Arena)
06.04.09 – Dusseldorf, Germany (LTU Arena)
06.05.09 – Dusseldorf, Germany (LTU Arena)
06.07.09 – Leipzig, Germany (Zentralstadion)
06.08.09 – Leipzig, Germany (Zentralstadion)
06.10.09 – Berlin, Germany (Olympiastadion)
06.12.09 – Frankfurt, Germany (Commerzbank Arena)
06.13.09 – Munich, Germany (Olympiastadion)
06.16.09 – Rome, Italy (Stadio Olimpico)
06.18.09 – Milan, Italy (Stadio San Siro)
06.20.09 – Werchter, Belgium (TW Classic Festival)
06.22.09 – Bratislava, Slovakia (Inter Stadium)
06.23.09 – Budapest, Hungary (Puskas Ferenc Stadium)
06.25.09 – Prague, Czech Republic (Slavia Stadium)
06.27.09 – Paris, France (Stade de France)
06.28.09 – Nancy, France (Zenith Amphitheatre)
06.30.09 – Copenhagen, Denmark (Parken Stadium)
07.02.09 – Bergen, Norway (Bergenhus Festning)
07.03.09 – Arvika, Sweden (Arvika Festival)
07.06.09 – Carcassone, France (Esplande Gambetta)
07.08.09 – Valladolid, Spain (Jose Zorilla Stadium)
07.09.09 – Bilbao, Spain (Bilbao BBK Live Festival)
07.11.09 – Porto, Portugal (Super Bock Super Rock Festival)
07.12.09 – Seville, Spain (Olimpic Stadium)
07.24.09 – Toronto, Ontario (Molson Amphitheater)
07.25.09 – Montreal, Quebec (Bell Centre)
07.28.09 – Washington, D.C. (Nissan Pavilion)
07.31.09 – Boston, MA (Comcast (Great Woods)
08.01.09 – Atlantic City, NJ (Borgata)
08.03.09 – New York, NY (Madison Square Garden)
08.10.09 – Seattle, WA (Key Arena)
08.12.09 – San Francisco, CA (Shoreline Amphitheater)
08.14.09 – San Diego, CA (Cricket Wireless Amphitheatre)
08.16.09 – Los Angeles, CA (Hollywood Bowl)
08.17.09 – Los Angeles, CA (Hollywood Bowl)
08.20.09 – Santa Barbara, CA (County Bowl)
08.22.09 – Las Vegas, NV (Pearl Concert Theater)
08.23.09 – Phoenix, AZ (U.S. Airways Center)
08.25.09 – Salt Lake City, UT (E Center)
08.27.09 – Denver, CO (Red Rocks)
08.29.09 – Dallas, TX (Superpages)
08.30.09 – Houston, TX (Woodlands Pavilion)
09.01.09 – Atlanta, GA (Lakewood Amphitheater)
09.04.09 – Tampa, FL (Ford Amphitheater)
09.05.09 – Ft. Lauderdale, FL (BankAtlantic Center)

Here’s the deal; we hear Lady Sovereign is coming to NY for a couple of intimate shows to promote her latest singles and upcoming LP Jigsaw, which comes out on her very own Midget Records, April 7. Her publicist tells us she’s “tired of traditional interviews,” but that she likes drinking, video games and futbol. So trying to combine all of these concepts into one, I challenged the foul-mouthed, major-label bouncin’, midget of grime to a game of foosball.

Of course we talked and drank a bit while we played at one of our favorite East Village dives, B-Side. She filled me in on her relationship with real midgets, what video games she fancies and her plans to do a Bon Iver-inspired folk album. But whatever Lady Sov tells you, she’s rubbish at foosball. I don’t want to give away the ending, but I let her win.

There are few things better than gettin’ a little intimate, and if it’s with Lady Sovereign, then we’re definitely in. Lady Sov will hit the east, west and middle America in a series of upcoming intimate club dates.

The one-night-only shows will feature Lady Sov and DJ Frampster performing songs off her new album, Jigsaw, alongside some classics. The pair will hit New York, Chicago and L.A., and without a whole lotta notice — tickets go on sale this Thursday for shows next week. So jump on it, Apache. Jump on it.

Lady Sovereign feat. DJ Frampster
01.26.09 – New York, NY (Pianos)
01.28.09 – Chicago, IL (Empty Bottle)
01.30.09 – Los Angeles, CA (Echo)

Lady Sovereign will return next year with her sophomore album, Jigsaw. The follow-up to 2006’s Public Warning! will be released on April 7 (April 6 in the UK) via her new label, Midget Records — which is actually just EMI with a different name.

Including collaborations with Dr. Luke (who produced “Love Me or Hate Me”), Spank Rock collaborator Benny Blanco, and Medasyn, Lady Sov has offered us a taste of the upcoming record in the way of “I Got You Dancing”. Hey, it features a vocoder effect, no one’s doing that these days.

Lady Sovereign – “I Got You Dancing”

From the mouth of Lady Sov herself: “Hey Hey! Just to let you know i’m alive! Today you can hear the first track “I Got You Dancing” from my new album. Call it an early Christmas gift! The album is the next chapter, it’s a massive leap forward for mankind!!!

Lady Sovereign
MySpace